Friendly Atheist Meme

With a hat tip to Sisyphus Fragment, here’s a cute little atheist meme that I’d like to pass along here. The idea is simple – here’s an assortment of things that atheists do, did, or could have done (in some cases, things that define the “New Atheists”) – with all the things I’ve personally done boldfaced.

Cheers.

  1. Participated in the Blasphemy Challenge. (There’s probably nothing like that in Hebrew, and if there was, I’d be lynched)
  2. Met at least one of the “Four Horsemen” (Richard Dawkins, Daniel Dennett, Christopher Hitchens, Sam Harris) in person. (I wish!)
  3. Created an atheist blog.
  4. Used the Flying Spaghetti Monster in a religious debate with someone.
  5. Gotten offended when someone called you an agnostic.
  6. Been unable to watch Growing Pains reruns because of Kirk Cameron.
  7. Own more Bibles than most Christians you know.
  8. Have at least one Bible with your personal annotations regarding contradictions, disturbing parts, etc.
  9. Have come out as an atheist to your family.
  10. Attended a campus or off-campus atheist gathering.
  11. Are a member of an organized atheist/Humanist/etc. organization.
  12. Had a Humanist wedding ceremony.
  13. Donated money to an atheist organization.
  14. Have a bookshelf dedicated solely to Richard Dawkins.
  15. Lost the friendship of someone you know because of your non-theism.
  16. Tried to argue or have a discussion with someone who stopped you on the street to proselytize. (Again, Israel, would be lynched)
  17. Hid your atheist beliefs on a first date because you didn’t want to scare him/her away. (Not ashamed of dates, am scared of zealots)
  18. Own a stockpile of atheist paraphernalia (bumper stickers, buttons, shirts, etc).
  19. Attended a protest that involved religion.
  20. Attended an atheist conference.
  21. Subscribe to Pat Condell’s YouTube channel. (he totally rocks)
  22. Started an atheist group in your area or school.
  23. Successfully “de-converted” someone to atheism. (The process is very much personal, but the inspiration came from me)
  24. Have already made plans to donate your body to science after you die.
  25. Told someone you’re an atheist only because you wanted to see the person’s reaction.
  26. Had to think twice before screaming “Oh God!” during sex. Or you said something else in its place. (lol?)
  27. Lost a job because of your atheism.
  28. Formed a bond with someone specifically because of your mutual atheism (meeting this person at a local gathering or conference doesn’t count).
  29. Have crossed “In God We Trust” off of — or put a pro-church-state-separation stamp on — dollar bills.
  30. Refused to recite the Pledge of Allegiance.
  31. Said “Gesundheit!” (or nothing at all) after someone sneezed because you didn’t want to say “Bless you!”
  32. Have ever chosen not to clasp your hands together out of fear someone might think you’re praying.
  33. Have turned on Christian TV because you need something entertaining to watch. (Would have if we had that kinda shit. Do idiot rabbis count?)
  34. Are a 2nd or 3rd (or more) generation atheist.
  35. Have “atheism” listed on your Facebook or dating profile — and not a euphemistic variant.
  36. Attended an atheist’s funeral (i.e. a non-religious service). (practically illegal in Israel)
  37. Subscribe to an freethought magazine (e.g. Free Inquiry, Skeptic)
  38. Have been interviewed by a reporter because of your atheism. (again, prescription for slaughter)
  39. Written a letter-to-the-editor about an issue related to your non-belief in God.
  40. Gave a friend or acquaintance a New Atheist book as a gift.
  41. Wear pro-atheist clothing in public. (should start, but only wear it in Tel Aviv, otherwise lynched)
  42. Have invited Mormons/Jehovah’s Witnesses into your house specifically because you wanted to argue with them.
  43. Have been physically threatened (or beaten up) because you didn’t believe in God.
  44. Receive Google Alerts on “atheism” (or variants).
  45. Received fewer Christmas presents than expected because people assumed you didn’t celebrate it.
  46. Visited The Creation Museum or saw Ben Stein’s Expelled just so you could keep tabs on the “enemy.”
  47. Refuse to tell anyone what your “sign” is… because it doesn’t matter at all.
  48. Are on a mailing list for a Christian organization just so you can see what they’re up to…
  49. Have kept your eyes open while you watched others around you pray.
  50. Avoid even Unitarian churches because they’re too close to religion for you.

5 Comments »

  1. galia Said:

    doing all the above sounds really like a new religion..

  2. freidenker85 Said:

    More like “a really bizarre obsession”. Religions require irrational faith. Couldn’t spot any irrational faith on that list.

    But yeah, that’d be a real cause for concern.

  3. calculated emotions Said:

    29 is funny

  4. jeffsdeepthoughts Said:

    I’m a Christian, but I wanted to play, too.
    (On a few of them. I have some pretty serious responses to some of these. But I don’t think anybody benefits by me sharing these here.)
    #4) I clicked the link to Flying Spaghetti monster because I’d only heard it referred to. I find it hilarious and dead on. There are some rather vocal Christians who this is a perfect lampoon of. I haven’t ever used it before but will be willing to do so in the future.

    #6) If the only reason you people can’t watch Growing Pains is Kirk Cameron, I have to express my sympathies. There are countless painful things about the show. Cameron is only one among many.

    #7 & 8) Just for the record, there are a variety of parts of the bible that I struggle with, too. And it seems to me that we ought to be more concerned with how much folks have read of the bible more than how many they own. I’m the first to concede that many atheists have in fact read more of the bible than my brothers and sisters in Christ; for me this is a much bigger problem than the number of bibles that sit on the shelves, gathering dust. In fact, I’d be tempting to criticize a Christian who squandered a bunch of money on more translations and bibles than he needed. I think we should be better stewards of God’s money than that, I think we should be using our money to care for widows and Orphans, as the prophets tell us, rather than purchasing a bunch of bibles.
    #33) I find Christian TV embarassing and silly, too.
    #34) I’m a first generation Christian. My folks were secular humanist hippies. Sometimes I feel like the Michael J. Fox Character on family ties who rebelled by becoming more traditional than his parents. (Not that I share in the character’s politics at all.)
    #37) I don’t read many magazines, these days. But I’ve read a lot of Richard Dawkins and Stephen Hawking, and a bit of Stephen Jay Gould. I think they are brilliant scientists. I think they are lousy theologions. Just for the record, if Billy Graham (or any body else with out scientific credentials) pretended to be a biologist, I’d be just as skeptical as I am when Dawkins or Hawking think they’re competent and qualified to make Theological claims.

    #45/#46 Both Ben Stien and The Creation Museum are parked firmly on the boundary between “goofy” and “dangerous” I’m unwilling to let my money fund them, however indirectly.

    #49 I’ve always wanted to do that one! It’d be rather hypocrtical, though, if I did it. I wonder if somebody can share what we look like, I’m quite curious.

  5. freidenker85 Said:

    Well, I think you might do 49 even while being Christian. I did it while I was Jewish (I never prayed or gotten into a praying situation as an atheist :P)

    I’d love to hear the serious things you have to say about the list. It’s really not a big deal for me – it’s just some fun atheist meme I’m passing around. Like I told you before, my atheism is not something I peddle too much nowadays. I rather leave the atheistbabble to other, more competent spokesmen – me? I just like being a free thinker. It’s way better than being Jewish, at least in here. And there’s also the clash that theism has with my worldview that’s an impossible-to-be-reconciled-clash.

    About Dawkins&co. – I don’t think they were pretending to be theologians (and I can’t help but wondering what exactly a theologist IS apart from a guy who says what he thinks about things other people said that they think about the bible) – I think they’re just trying to put theism under an objective microscope. Deacon Duncan has a lot of theological background (he quotes the bible something nasty on his blog) – and he’s an extremely avid atheist, way more than I am. A lot of atheists on the tubes say that the reason they dropped out of religion was *because* of their religious upbringing.

    So I don’t know how relevant credentials are – but I’m willing to give you the benefit of the doubt mainly because I’m not particularly interested in what Dawkins has to say about religion per se as opposed to what he has to say as a scientist (I much prefer “the ancestor’s tale” over “the god delusion”)


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